Save the boys
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Overstated
Some educators say the "boys' crisis" is an exaggeration.
"The situation isn't so bad that they have to be 'saved'," says psychology professor Yuan Jun from Shanghai Normal University. "We don't need to panic. Overemphasizing it might make the situation worse."
Wu Zengqiang, an expert from the Shanghai Academy of Educational Sciences, agrees that "boys have issues" but wouldn't call it the situation dire.
He does agree that boys are less independent, brave and determined than they should.
Parents spoil them and coop them up indoors instead of letting them run around outside because they think nature and vigorous exercise are dangerous.
Whether or not they agree there's a boys "crisis," most experts agree China's test-oriented, scores-are-everything education system leaves much to be desired and drives both boys and girls too hard.
Author Sun argues that it's bad for both boys and girls as individuals but says the system does more harm to boys.
"In a system that ignores gender differences and demands every student be quiet and obedient, there are heavy shackles on boys who have at least 15 times more testosterone than girls," he says. "Boys and girls are not parts on an assembly line that have the same size, shape and function."
Boys' ability to read and write develops two years later than girls, even nerves in a boys' fingers grow more slowly than girls, says Sun.
"My son has trouble holding a brush and writing Chinese characters with complicated strokes," says one man. Girls do better earlier, though boys catch up as their coordination improves.
"But they are required to learn the same thing at the same speed. This is so unfair," Sun says.
Some boys are regarded as slow or silly because they have so much energy and have a hard time sitting still. "This can make them hate school starting in the first grade," says Sun.
Though boys need to run around, many schools eliminate vigorous and demanding physical exercise for both boys and girls - lest accidents result in lawsuits. Exuberance is generally discouraged.
"The education system is more suitable for girls, who are good at memorizing and like sitting quietly to read," says author Li.
Girly boys
There's a consensus that boys are behaving more like girls, giving rise to the pretty boy or flowery boy phenomenon, which is very evident in TV talent shows for young people.
"Paternal education is almost zero in a Chinese family, where the father is responsible of making money and the mother is responsible for educating and communicating with the children," author Li says.
This makes boys girlish and not brave enough, he says. "At home they depend on their moms, while at school most teachers from kindergarten to high school are female."
The father of the seven-year-old first-grader says boys are overprotected and overburdened. One child can be indulged by as many as six adults, he notes.
"My son struggles to keep up in school while at home he is often literally 'hand-fed' by a grandmother who insists that he eat, though he has lost his appetite by eating so much junk food.
"When he is criticized, he sometimes bursts into tears."
"Boys today are not masculine enough," says Yang Guofang, a retired Chinese teacher in Xinsong High School in Minhang District. Yang remembers a 10th grader who insisted his mother sit with him while he did his homework, wash his back in the bathtub and cuddle him until he fell asleep.
"This was abnormal and I suggested the mother take him to a psychologist," says Yang. "But she said the behavior was no big deal and he would grow out of it without problems."
